Via txt
I received a text just yesterday, not a good one, one of the bad ones. I got dumped. Well, that's not exactly accurate seeing as we weren't officially seeing each other, but really there isn't quite the word I'm looking for.. Hmm, I suppose it's more like I got "ditched" as in left by the side of the road, out in the cold. The guy decided I was not girlfriend material and chose to convey those words via text message.
Joy of joys. So I finally meet someone that actually is relatively fun to be around and I screw it up by my over-eager sense of "jee wiz, a guy who gets me." I'm sure I'm not the first to make that mistake. But for crying out loud, this is the first time, in a very long time I even let my guard down enough to be the crazy, out there, just well, me.
I'm the first to admit I talk too much. I feel too much. I live my life because that's what I'm here to do. I mean, seriously, what good is living if you hide yourself away from it all the time? But, honestly, I've done my fair share of hiding as well.
I've hid from the fact that I am lonely.
I travel, I work on my career. I have great friends. But, ultimately, I do these things alone.
Events in my life pass only through my eyes.
I share these events second hand through the phone, through talking. But that isn't really sharing, that's explaining.
Sharing is being there with someone else.
Recently, very, very recently, I've come to the realization that I am tired of being alone. I see wonderful things that are mine alone. And no-one elses. I'd rather those moments belong to two rather than one.
"We are born into this world alone and we die alone." I have no idea who said that. But how true.
And in this interim, we are more and more in our society alone. Every day is becoming a wasted day. Because it's important to have those times alone and discover who you are, but also, too much time and you forget that there is so precious little time to really know another human being. To belong to and be with.
So quickly life will pass and again you will be solitary on a road no other can follow.
Joy of joys. So I finally meet someone that actually is relatively fun to be around and I screw it up by my over-eager sense of "jee wiz, a guy who gets me." I'm sure I'm not the first to make that mistake. But for crying out loud, this is the first time, in a very long time I even let my guard down enough to be the crazy, out there, just well, me.
I'm the first to admit I talk too much. I feel too much. I live my life because that's what I'm here to do. I mean, seriously, what good is living if you hide yourself away from it all the time? But, honestly, I've done my fair share of hiding as well.
I've hid from the fact that I am lonely.
I travel, I work on my career. I have great friends. But, ultimately, I do these things alone.
Events in my life pass only through my eyes.
I share these events second hand through the phone, through talking. But that isn't really sharing, that's explaining.
Sharing is being there with someone else.
Recently, very, very recently, I've come to the realization that I am tired of being alone. I see wonderful things that are mine alone. And no-one elses. I'd rather those moments belong to two rather than one.
"We are born into this world alone and we die alone." I have no idea who said that. But how true.
And in this interim, we are more and more in our society alone. Every day is becoming a wasted day. Because it's important to have those times alone and discover who you are, but also, too much time and you forget that there is so precious little time to really know another human being. To belong to and be with.
So quickly life will pass and again you will be solitary on a road no other can follow.
posted by ldbug at Tuesday, October 28, 2008
2 Comments:
this is so sad, not the txdump, but that you feel lonely.i imagine some if it is from being far from home with the holidays coming up.
Getting dumped or ditched is never fun. And to do it by text is just plain spineless.
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