A bumpy ride

I thought I'd regal you guys with a few stories of my adventures in Montana for the next few posts. I have a lot of work to catch up on, and I'm still in "recovery mode" so I'm using some old material until I'm up for more New York adventures.

Anyway, since it's kinda windy out today, I got to thinking about the last couple days I was in Montana. I woke up last Saturday to the wind. I'm talking howling wind. The kind of wind that jumps down from the mountains and tears shingles off of houses, rips trees in half, drives so hard the walls around you shudder. Not being the delightful morning person you might see me as, I stayed in bed. I was also coming down with a cold, so I did the math, (Cold blizzard winds) + (painfully sore throat) = Stay in bed till noon.

When I finally ventured out to the local college basketball game with my parents, I saw some of the real damage the storm had caused. Montana's a dry place, at least on my side of the divide, so the trees there root deep for water. It takes a lot to knock a tree over, and even this storm didn't manage to pull up roots. Instead it snapped the trees in half! We saw two on the way, one toppled at the old Kalzak's place smashing through the front yard fence, and the other at a park. And this is the protected part of town, in the valley; some people lost their roofs.

Ok, so fast forward to Sunday, I'm packed and ready. Heading to the airport, my parents helpfully point out more fallen debris and I anxiously put the weatherman's report of "severe wind for Sunday" out of my mind. We get to the airport, hang around for a bit, then I walk out to the tarmac and board the little plane. Oh, goody, the wind is blasting away. Everyone sits, they close the door and then the flight attendant followed by the pilot repeatedly warn us to make sure out seat belts are tight because it’s going to be “a really, really bumpy ride.” Great. Lovely. Have I mentioned how much I hate flying? Now imagine how much more I hate flying during a windstorm with a tight seat belt. Good. Keep imagining now as the flight attendant stresses again how bumpy this ride is going to be. Now imagine my reaction as I study the exit routes. Got that so far? Ok, now we take off, the plane takes longer than usual to get off the ground, maybe the wind. We get up a bit and start getting tossed about. Oh joy of all joys! I can’t feel my legs! Possibly because the seatbelt is cutting circulation! And hell, I know that seatbelt isn’t going to do a damn thing if we – what the hell? Why are we turning? In-this-wind- (imagine gritted teeth, nervous passengers, a sharply banking plane turning north, full circle around the valley as we climb through the wind to head south) Now my stomach drops out as the plane is buffeted by a gust, we straighten slightly, then continue with the turn.

An hour later we land safely in Salt Lake and I, sore throat and all, head to the nearest airport bar. I’m not getting on that plane to New York without a little more support than a seatbelt.

picture courtesy of: www.tarleton.edu